Taking care of yourself

The demands on a youth worker are beyond human capacity and yet we try to do it all. The results are not pretty. Here are some hints that aren't always covered in the manuals and periodicals.

1. We can't do everything – beware the “one thing too many syndrome.” There is a point at which we are at capacity – do not go beyond it.
   
   • Just because a neighbor church or a peer is doing something successful, you may not have the time or skill or interest to do it.
     
   • Resist pressure to reproduce other people's programs by being honest and saying what the problem is (e.g. “I don't have any more weekends left!”).
     
   • Consider or ask those pressing for a new program: What do we drop in order to add this activity?
2. Many things can be allowed to be mediocre. Evaluate the value of an effort based on long term effect on the youth or the program.
   
3. Make sure your basic human needs (love, food, sleep, sex) are being taken care of adequately.
   
   • If for some reason you are not able to do so in the fashion you would like, take the time to work out acceptable alternatives. Work on changing your mindset to be content with your situation.
     
   • Ignoring your sexual needs is a recipe for disaster. These cannot be ignored, suppressed or repressed. You want to make sure you take care of them in a socially and religiously acceptable manner.
     
   • Stop and figure out how much sleep you need, short-term and long term.
   • Look at an approaching week – over the course of it will you get your long term minimum.
   • If you have an event that will be pushing your short term limit (e.g. Lock-in) plan time off before and after for sleep and relaxation. You cannot “stock up” ahead on sleep, only make up it afterward, but if you are well rested going into an event you are more effective during it.
   • Be rigid about protecting your sleep quotas, everyone and all your work suffers when you are sleep deprived. Especially if you are going to be driving.
4. Have a day off, no-matter-what but make the actual day of the week flexible and make the plan publicly known. A rigid day off, will either limit what you can do or you'll not get a day off if you cannot avoid working on your day off. For example take Saturday off to be with family, unless you you have an event on Saturday, in which case take Friday off.
   
5. Have a hobby totally unrelated to your work that you enjoy (many like to hike, I like to do computer programming).
   
6. Plan breaks throughout the year rather than concentrating all such time off in one large vacation block.
   
7. As all the youth ministry literature insists, your family time is crucial for ever so many reasons. As the older people insist, children grow up and are gone very quickly. Don't miss this time with your children (and during the parenting rough times, remind yourself that these things will soon pass). Be prepared to take extra time when spouse, partner or children require it.
   
8. Have someone other than a spouse to unload on when frustrations build up – you need a pastor too.
   
9. Some people eat when frustrated others stop eating when frustrated. Know your maintenance calorie count and stay near it.
   
10. If you've been doing youth work which often take you outdoors for a very long time get a dermatologist and monitor your skin on a regular basis.
    
11. Find a type of heavy exercise you can enjoy and do it 3-4 times a week. A noon time work-out breaks the day, reduces stress and avoids a big meal.
    
12. Although they are expected in the business world, try to avoid breakfast and lunch meetings. Especially if you tend too eat too much at such meetings.