Working with student or parent misperceptions

Misperceptions are a normal and constant part of youth ministry.  People misunderstand our actions, intentions or ideas.  One of the common misperceptions is whether or not we favor one youth over another.  Using that as an example here are a few hints for dealing with any kind of misperception.

• Look objectively or get a second opinion to make sure they and not you are misperceiving things.  Maybe you are inadvertently favoring one youtn
• Do not directly attack the misperception – “You're wrong, I don't favor others” – or be defensive -- "I give Julie attention because she doesn't whine all the time."
•  Without being obvious, give counter examples: “Did you notice how everyone listened to your idea? They really seem to appreciate you” “Did you know that the youth group liked Susie's idea and they are following her lead on the project.”
•  Always give them time. They change on a dime. The problem may go away in a month.
•  Sometimes they feel better about a situation or program in retrospect. They may go through the whole, “We've never done this before; Do we have to?” routine, but in the end enjoy themselves and want to do it again.